Dorjee Gyürme, age 65
at Old Camp Number Two, Bylakuppe, India
January 14, 2005.
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I was seventeen years old when I came to India. I came some time after His Holiness came. I am from Kham province in the far east of Tibet, from a large village there. It was two kilometers from Ghantse district. It was called Homi, an is quite near the border with China, far to the north. My father's name was Yama Gerik. I had three brothers and one sister. One of my brothers has died.

When I was ten years old, problems started with China. That was when they started to cause problems for Tibetans. They had already invaded us on the eastern side there in Kham, and were making promises to us they didn't keep, and were cheating us. At that time, Tibetan children were afraid of the Chinese. Some older people had told us that the Chinese ate human meat. Of course, it wasn't true, but we didn't know that at the time, and we were afraid. Some local Tibetans escaped from their villages and stayed in the hills around our village for over two months. This was maybe in 1950. My family was part of this group. Most of the villagers left at this time, into the mountains. We set up tents and stayed in them. The tents were made from yak wool. It was during the spring. It was cold, but not so cold at that time. We had many yaks and sheep. There were both farmers and nomads staying there together at that time. We had brought our yaks and sheep there with us to the mountains.

The Chinese soldiers were very smart. They told us they had come there for our liberation. They told us that after they finished their work, they would return to China, as if they had never been in Tibet before. At that time, they were very helpful to us. They helped us to build houses. During the construction, they helped us to cut wood and to make bricks in the fields. There were no roads that buses or trucks could travel on in those days. There was also no airport, so they made a proposal to establish an airport and make a road. They also said they would give us extra food and other things. There were millions of Chinese soldiers there, so many of them.

At that time, we Tibetans were very naïve. We didn't have any idea what the world outside of Tibet was like. We didn't have a modern education. There was a general regional leader, and all the local leaders were under him, and he ruled over the Tibetans in that part of Kham. We Tibetans depended on his decisions for what we did. These leaders at that time were not very sophisticated, and they didn't have any idea that China was going to occupy Tibet for themselves. The Chinese officials also gave money to these leaders and made many promises to them. The leaders and some of the lamas even got a salary from the Chinese government, around a hundred thousand per month. They were also taken to major cities in China for meetings.

A year later, the airport was ready, and the first airplane came and landed. All of the animals and the people were afraid of it. The people were all crying and shouting from fear.

Then the Chinese asked the Tibetan leaders to send laborers for the construction of a road. The laborers were given a small wage for their work. They were making the roads so they could transport more Chinese soldiers. At this time, almost all Tibetans are united, and agree that China should not occupy Tibet any more. At that time, however, all Tibetans were not united, and that was why Tibet was able to be so easily occupied. The regional leaders this far to the east did not have such a strong connection or commitment to Lhasa. The Chinese soldiers didn't have very good weapons, and they didn't have very good food either. At that time, if all Tibetans had been united, we could have stopped the Chinese, but we were not united, and we were so naïve.

The road linked various villages and districts, and they were able to transport many more Chinese soldiers. They told us many times that the soldiers were going to liberate Tibet and equalize life for all Tibetans, rich and poor. They told us they would never think of staying on after the liberation was completed. They told us they didn't want to stay in Tibet, and that they would return to their homes just as soon as the liberation was completed. The Chinese government was very smart and cunning. They were even able to fool the oldest and wisest Tibetans in our area. I was young when this was happening, and I am not so old now, so I have very clear memories of these events. Before the Second World War, China was trying to get help from within Tibet to fight against the Western countries - the British. After that, they were just trying to get Tibet for themselves.

Then the Chinese army confiscated possessions from all the wealthier families. They told us we would have more enemies because we were going to share the wealth with everybody. They told us that the Americans and the British were already our enemies. Then they took away all weapons from Tibetans, saying that they would need them because there would be more dangerous enemies. They told us that if all Tibetans and all Chinese were united, then we could fight against all these enemies successfully. So they connected weapons with enemies, and enemies with equalization, and equalization with liberation.

By this time, the Tibetan people had some idea that the Chinese government was cheating them, and that the changes were not good, and they began to talk about escaping from their village. My father was one of the first in our village to begin thinking about leaving. It was difficult to plan, because the Chinese kept changing the rules. Soon, however, my father and the family, part of a group of about fifteen or sixteen people, escaped from the village, bringing weapons with us. My father then joined a group of guerillas, and whenever they saw Chinese troops, they would try to kill them. They were on horses, and it was guerilla warfare, moving around a lot. This went on for three years. I believe it was 1952 when the three years were finished, and perhaps late 1949 when my father became a guerilla fighter. We had many deaths amongst our fighters, due to lack of weapons, lack of food, and lack of blood for the injured. There were many other difficulties, too, but these three were the main ones. The whole family had escaped at this time, and were staying where my father stayed. All the children and the women were hiding in a very secret place. My father was the only man from our village who had taken all his family with him. In fact, I'm quite certain he was the only man in the whole of Ghantse District who had brought his whole family into the mountains for hiding during this guerilla warfare. My father was very smart and very brave, I think. During this three years, the Chinese army confiscated all weapons and "liberated" the whole area.

There was a lama soon afterwards who asked my father to help him escape. My father refused, however, because he had a big family of his own. The lama was not married and didn't have any family, but for my father the situation was very different. The lama was taking all his belongings and his horse, and going toward the Northwest, where there was snow. He was going to Lhasa by a route to the Northwest, through the snow. He knew by now that the Chinese government was going to do no good. He wanted to go to Lhasa, so he went ahead.

But not so long afterward, my father suggested to the family that it was not a good idea to stay there in our village. He felt now that it would be better to go to Lhasa too, but by a different route. He went to one high lama at a temple and they meditated together. This lama was also an astrologer, and he suggested to my father that he go to Lhasa, and the indications were that he would definitely reach Lhasa and not have any major problem. So my father made the decision to do it.

We didn't have any precious possessions to bring with us, only four rifles and one revolver that had not been confiscated by the Chinese. We also had four yaks and thirty goats. Before we left, however, my father had gone to the same lama to get his blessing. He had told this lama that he was going to destroy all his weapons and throw all the parts away into the river. That lama told him this was good, and that after he threw them all away, he should build a stupa. So my father did destroy all these weapons since it wasn't possible to bring them. We would certainly have been arrested if the Chinese had seen any weapons while we were traveling.

We decided to go and sold all our sheep and yaks, except for two yaks and one ox and one horse. Then we borrowed one more horse, and decided to go. At that time, it was just the beginning of autumn. We decided to go a different route from the lama, and we didn't have any trouble on the way. By the grace of God, we didn't face any problems, all the way to Lhasa. It took four months to reach Lhasa.

My father was sixty years old, and I was the eldest son. Because our father was so old and his children were so young, the Chinese officials and soldiers along the way never suspected anything. They were thinking that we were nomads or beggars. Since we had left at the very beginning of autumn, we reached Lhasa during the first month of winter. Here we can try to see the way we came (looking at a map).

First we went to Jando, and from there to Chamdo. We came following this route: from Deke to Jamdo, Jamdo to Chamdo, Chamdo to Dechen, Dechen to Pema, Pema to Hare, Hare to Jamda, and Jamda to Lhasa. This was a different route from the lama, who had gone further to the north, where it was much colder.

We had planned carefully to go this way, and followed the plan strictly. My father did much research to determine the best route. Before the Chinese invasion, there was no road through this area. The only way to travel in this area was on horseback, and the Tibetan businessmen that he knew had traveled to Lhasa many times, going various ways and arguing about the good and bad points of each route. So he sought advice from several different experienced business travelers, and finally decided upon this route. He himself had never been to Lhasa before, but many businessmen went on a regular basis before the Chinese invasion, taking a very large number of horses or some kind of pack animals. But now, the Chinese were already building a road through this area, going toward Lhasa. So to make it as easy as possible, we just followed the road the Chinese had already built. From where we started until our arrival at Chamdo, we met many Chinese soldiers busy building this road.

By the time we reached Chamdo, our animals had developed severe problems with their legs, and it was impossible to continue further with these wounded animals. We decided to take a Chinese bus toward Lhasa. There were many military buses headed west. They told us that if we went back to our home in Ghantse, then we would not have to pay for the ride, but that it would be impossible for us to get a ride continuing on westward to Lhasa. We were there for five days, and as far as we could tell, not a single Tibetan was able to move onwards toward Lhasa during the entire time.

At Chamdo, we met with some relatives... with people from the same village that we had come from. We made a business deal with them, and bought two donkeys and one horse, and bought some colorful textiles to bring with us on the journey, and some Chinese snuff and some other merchandise. We were passing through some very isolated villages, villages which were even more isolated after the Chinese invasion than they had already been. So as we went along, we were able to sell everything. In exchange, we got things we could eat - oil, meat and butter, and we really enjoyed it. It felt like a big party.

Along the route, some people told us that this route was very dangerous, and that there were many robbers. They told us there was a good chance that they would not only rob us, but also quite possibly kill us. My father was very shrewd, however. He bought a Chinese torch (flashlight), and he wrapped it like a gun and tied it with a rope around his waist, so it would look like he was carrying pistols. They were all scared of him, because it really did look like a pistol. Of course, it was also very useful to have a torch at night. Twice robbers did try to rob us, but he threatened to shoot them if they didn't clear the path. The robbers still had guns, because they were so isolated from the Chinese military, but they backed down when my father threatened them.

By the grace of God, we did successfully reach Lhasa. The first thing we did there was to visit the Jokhang Temple. Next, we visited the three most important monasteries of the Gelug-pa - Ganden, Drepung and Sera Je. (We now have the same three here in India.) After visiting all these holy places, we couldn't go to visit His Holiness the Dalai Lama. Usually, every individual Tibetan can go to meet with His Holiness, especially when visiting after such a long trip as ours. Before we had reached Lhasa, we had heard that there were lots of Chinese soldiers in Lhasa. But after we had reached the city, we were still surprised to see them because there were just so many of them. They had built many buildings and various things, and these roads and buildings were much bigger and better than what we had in our village back home so far away. But we were very discouraged by the situation.

Afterwards, my father met with the same lama who had gone earlier from our home village, following the northern route. He had arrived earlier than us. My father told the lama that Lhasa was the national capital of the Tibetan people, and that like our village at home, it was also occupied by the Chinese army. He said there was nowhere to go, and asked the lama what should be done. He asked whether it would be better to go on or better to stay, and whether or not he should find an astrologer. The lama said that he should not seek out an astrologer, but advised him to go to India if he could, and that if he couldn't go to India, it would be better to go to Shigatse, because it was closer to India. The lama told my father that he himself was going to India. So we all went on to Shitgase. We had been in Lhasa for exactly one lunar month.

We took all of our oxen and moved on ahead to Shigatse. It took fifty days to reach Shigatse. It usually took people only seven days to make that journey. At that time, the Panchen Lama was at Shigatse. We lived there for three years. This was from about 1955 to 1958.

When we first arrived there, we didn't have any property with which to run a business, so we couldn't do anything. There was generally a lack of business then for Tibetans in Shigatse, and many other Tibetans who had come from other places like us, so things were quite difficult at that time.

Back then, there was a secret agent of the American CIA (Central Intelligence Agency) who was helping to organize resistance to the Chinese army. At that time, there were many farmers from eastern Tibet staying in Shigatse who had previously been wealthy. They were now unable to do much of anything to support their families, so many joined the Chushi Gandruk rebel fighters. The native villagers in Shigatse didn't much care for them doing this, because they thought it was better to live as nomads. They answered that the Chinese military was going to destroy Tibet and its people, and that there was no integration and unity amongst the Tibetan people. Most of the younger people were ready to join the fight against the Chinese, but the Panchen Lama and his followers didn't like that idea. The Panchen Lama's top advisors were getting a good salary at that time from the Chinese government. They said that if we fought, the Chinese government would certainly destroy all of Tibet.

America was a good country to support the Tibetan fighters. They used a special airplane to drop guns for the Chushi Gangdruk rebels, and that was why the younger people were deciding to fight. The CIA was providing good quality guns, so they went. Most of the younger people had already gone to fight before we arrived in Shigatse. Because of the rebel fighters, the Chinese were not able to come immediately and to occupy Shigatse and the region just surrounding it. Because of the resistance of the volunteer soldiers of the Chushi Gandruk, thousands of Tibetans were able to come through Shigatse safely, including His Holiness the Dalai Lama and many of his monks.

My father at that time thought that because of the help from the Americans, it was only a question of time before there would be a Tibetan victory against the Chinese. He was very encouraged by their support. He had been very discouraged in Lhasa, but now he was quite hopeful because of the help from the CIA.

On the 10th of March, 1959, we heard that His Holiness the Dalai Lama was about to be arrested by the Chinese authorities in Lhasa. We also heard the voice of a famous singer in the Chinese army coming from a distant microphone. But it was not so far from Shigatse. There was a large bridge nearby over a deep river. We heard that there were hundreds of Tibetan fighters camped under the bridge, all of them members of the volunteer Chushi Gangdruk rebel army. We also heard that they were going to attack the Chinese soldiers, so everybody, laymen and monks, was told to stay indoors and not to go outside. After that, we heard hundreds of horsemen move through the city. We later heard that they had attacked the Chinese soldiers, and we also learned later that fighting had broken out simultaneously between Tibetans and Chinese soldiers in Lhasa.

Pretending that the Tibetan government army was preparing for war, some Tibetans who worked secretly for the Chinese came to ask for all the weapons that Tibetans were keeping in their homes. They shifted them all into one room, and then secretly from there they gave them to the Chinese government. They wanted to fight against the Tibetan government on the 10th of March, and these weapons would be a big help to them. That's why they were pretending to act as a Chushi Gangdruk army agency, but they were tricking us. They wanted to distribute weapons for use against the Tibetan government.

If the Tibetan people had been outside of their homes, they would have seen that it was actually Chinese soldiers who were taking all the weapons, but they had tricked all the Tibetans into staying in their homes, and all the monks into staying in their monasteries, so that they cold easily steal the weapons. From the top of the mountain hill station - that was Shigatse - the Tibetans there saw what they thought were the Chushi Gangdruk fighters preparing for war, but it was actually Chinese soldiers dressed in Tibetan clothing. From so far away, it was not possible for them to distinguish the faces and know they were actually Chinese soldiers. So it was all over, it was a great and successful trick. The Chinese had actually taken all the weapons for themselves, and there were no weapons with which to fight against them.

When the soldiers who pretended to be Chushi Gandruk fighters entered the Tibetan government army camp at Shigatse, the Tibetans were reciting mantras. They surrounded and captured all the Tibetan soldiers and arrested them without firing a single shot. It took only half an hour to complete this task. They were very cunning.

There are lots of tall mountains around Shigatse. There were lots of Chinese soldiers there, waiting and ready in position with lots of weapons. So two hours after the army had surrendered, these soldiers flooded into Shigatse and entered all the homes and arrested al Tibetan government officials. They took all the prisoners to Lhasa. The people that were left behind didn't have any idea where their family members and friends and neighbors who had been captured had been taken, nor what was being done to them. My father had not been taken, because he was not a local Tibetan, and not important in Shigatse, and had no business contacts in Shigatse.

So now, early in 1959, all the major districts of Tibet - Lhasa, Shigatse, all of them, about 23 in total - were occupied by the Chinese army. A few days later, the Chinese officials told all of us that there was no Tibetan nation, and that there was no Tibetan government, and the only government in Tibet was the Chinese government. They said the only problems between the Tibetan people and the Chinese people were problems caused by the Americans and the British. So now there were no more Tibetan flags flying over the houses and buildings, only Chinese flags. Then they told us that we didn't have any leaders, that we were all equal.

Later, after almost a year had passed, they announced that all Tibetans who were under the age of nineteen would be taken to China to become educated people, and that their parents wouldn't have to contribute anything in return to the Chinese government for this great opportunity. I was on the list of those to be taken, as were my four brothers and sister. I was seventeen years old.

My father was very worried about his children being taken so far away from their native place. So he made a decision to bring the family to India. After all, they had all left their family home in far Eastern Tibet precisely because he didn't want to give his children to the Chinese, and now they had come all the way west to Shigatse, and the Chinese government was planning to take them all away. He was very worried about this.

One day my father inquired about all the various routes to India from Shigatse, asking various businessmen about all the various roads, about their conditions and what was better or worse about taking each different road. So he decided to go from Shigatse to the Gambha zone, and from the Gambha zone, which was near the Indian border, into India.

First, from Shigatse to Göthu, we went only at night and hid during the daylight. From our native place far to the east it had taken us four months to get to Lhasa, but we hadn't had any real problems. Now it was springtime, and it was still cold. His Holiness the Dalai Lama had already escaped to India, and we knew that. By now it was 1960, the spring of 1960. We had spent three years in Shigatse.

To Sikkim from Shigatse, it usually takes four days, or maybe five, by walking. But it took us fifteen days going at night, with children, and needing to hide from the Chinese officials and soldiers all along the way. There was no moonlight at that time, and it was very dark. We had to be very quiet and couldn't light any fires, so we only ate cold food, mostly just cold tsampa, and sometimes a little dried meat. If the Chinese caught us, the best thing that could happen would be if we were sent back to where we came from; we didn't know what the worst was. We didn't see any other people while we were going to Sikkim - no other refugees, not anybody.

When we got close to the border, we didn't have any food left at all, and we only had 100 Chinese rupees with us. So we gave that money to some nomads who gave us some dried meat, and we put the dried meat in some bags and took it with us. By the time we got to the border with India, the meat smelled very badly, so the border guards waved us through in a real hurry, because they couldn't stand the stench of the rotten meat. Before finding this meat, they had started to search us and our possessions. However, once they found the meat, they just waved us through as quickly as possible, and didn't want to check anything else at all. They had a Tibetan translator at the border, so we understood what they were telling us.

Now that we had arrived in India, we finally understood just how tired we were. We slept the entire first day there. We were completely exhausted, and our legs and knees and ankles were very, very sore. The meat that smelled so strongly was actually okay. With dried meat, we Tibetans usually know the difference between meat that smells bad and meat that's actually gone bad, and this meat was okay, so we ate it, and we were just fine. There wasn't much else to eat, anyway.

When we came into Gangtok, the capitol of Sikkim, there were some Sikkimese farmers there, so we begged for food from them and got some rice and milk. We cooked it, but it wasn't really soft enough to digest properly. It was different from our food, and we didn't really know how to cook it properly at our camp.

Then we had another border to cross, because at that time Sikkim was an independent nation, and not part of India as it is today. So we arrived at Tseta, where there was a big Indian army camp. The soldiers recorded the names of all the refugees that arrived. They suggested to us that we go to a camp nearby a large river, next to an army camp. On the other side of the river there was a big tent set up, and there was food available there too. The army officials told us there were other Tibetan people there too. So after we were thoroughly checked by the Indian army officials, we crossed the bridge over the river and went there to the tent site. We would find many other Tibetans there on the other side of the river.

There were about ten or fifteen tents that were all empty. The only tent that wasn't empty was the kitchen, which had a Tibetan cook and a few others inside. We were overjoyed to see them. They asked us if we were Tibetan, and we told them that we were. They prepared one tent for us and cleaned it for us. Then they told us they wanted to ask us about the situation inside of Tibet. They were hoping to hear that Tibet was now free and that they could return, because they didn't want to stay any longer in India.

At five o'clock, our neighbors returned home to their tents, carrying their various tools - picks and shovels and things like that. Before we left Tibet, the Chinese had told us all that there was no point in going to India, because the Indians would force us back into Tibet after confiscating any weapons we had. So my father was very happy to see that Tibetans were not being forced back into Tibet by the Indian army.

Because we were the most recent arrivals, many people came that evening to ask us about the current situation inside of Tibet. They were especially anxious because many of them had not been able to bring their entire families to India and had left loves ones behind. They were quite surprised to see that our whole family had made it to India, however, even my youngest siblings and the oldest members of our family, all of us there together in exile.

The refugees were all being given two rupees a day for their labor, both men and women. The neighbors in the next tent told us that the site where they worked was very dangerous. It was in some very rocky mountains. They had to climb up onto very high peaks, bringing up various heavy tools with which to dig rock. There were many, many difficulties being faced there, they told us. Many people had become ill, and there were many accidents, and quite a few people had been seriously injured and had died. Sometimes there were avalanches and rockslides. Many died because of chronic health problems, from the change in weather and diet and the stress of being refugees and without a real home. Many others died from explosions, because they didn't know how to use dynamite properly and had no training. About two or three people died per day. Some who died were men, and some were women.

During the work, little children were often kept in a bucket by the side of the road - infants, that is. Children that were just barely big enough were sent to school in Darjeeling, so many parents didn't get to see their children. There was no hospital nearby, and almost no medical facilities, so people who were injured had to go all the way to Gangtok for treatment.

Because we were from Ghantse, we were sent to join a group of other Tibetan refugees from Ghantse some distance away. Because some members of our family were very young and some others were very old, we were given a hundred rupees and some food to bring with us, but we couldn't bring most of our possessions with us - it wasn't possible to bring them. They weighed too much. I was seventeen years old myself at the time. It took us about four or five days to reach the Ghantse group by walking.

We stayed there for five or six months. Then we heard that the Chushi Gandruk were going to set up a camp at Tulo. So they announced that the younger ones should go there. The CIA was supporting the insurgency of the Chushi Gandruk. All the younger people who couldn't work that hard were sent to this camp, to join the army. So many people who were not participating in road construction didn't get paid and faced many problems. At that time, there were no buses, so they hiked from Gangtok to Kalimpong at night. It took two nights to arrive. Sikkim was still a separate country from India in those days. It didn't join India until a few years later.

After we reached Kalimpong, we set up a tent there. Some people advised us that it was best to join the army, while others recommended trying to join the newly-founded Tibetan Institute of Performing Arts. The settlements were also being started, so we put our name on the list to join one of the new settlements in India. We stayed in Kalimpong for two months. When my father consulted the lamas, he was told that the best thing for the family would be to join one of the new settlements. So after all of this, we came to the new settlements in Bylakuppe.

It took five or six days by train to arrive at Mysore from Kalimpong. From there, we took a bus. There were tents set up, and many elephants were there staying by the tents. We arrived at five or six o'clock in the evening. In Kushalnigar, the closest town, there were only three shops and maybe one or two houses at that time. The only houses at Bylakuppe besides the tents were some grass huts. At that time, India was very poor. It was not so long ago really, only 1961.

So I started working. I had only one day a week of rest, and because I was young, I was only paid one rupee per day for work. I was seventeen years old. My younger brothers were all in school. At this time, my family was very poor. I just barely missed going to school myself because of my age. If I had been sixteen, I would have been sent to school.

I did many different kinds of work. We had to cut down many trees to make fields for growing our food. When we arrived, people told us it would be very difficult to survive there, and to establish our settlement. As soon as a tree was cut down, another would grow in its place, they told us. There was one woman from Switzerland who was helping us there as an aid worker. She managed to have thirteen bulldozers sent to Bylakuppe to help us, through the participation of His Holiness the Dalai Lama. After that, preparing the land for construction wet much more quickly.

Now things are better for Tibetan refugees. I have a comfortable life here. My brother is in America, and another brother and his wife are also in America. And a younger brother and sister are in England, as well as my son, and my younger brother is in France. So I continue to live here in Bylakuppe, and so does the wife of my brother's son.

This photograph was taken in 1960. This is my family. Here is my father and his mother, and his wife and his brother and his wife's sister. This picture was taken in India. And these are all my sons. They were all born after I arrived in India. These three are all in the United States. One is in New York, another is in Seattle, and the other is in New Mexico.

My major hope is that Tibet will again be sovereign and independent - not autonomy, but full sovereignty. Autonomy means living under Chinese control and Chinese ideas and ideals. I think it is still very possible, and I hope it will happen, because it is impossible to live under oppression.

Many of the younger Tibetans have left India and gone abroad, and many others are trying to go overseas. So I think that many of the younger Tibetans are not seriously interested in the Tibetan issue. This is a very bad situation. Young Tibetans should not go about their business without thinking about their nation and their culture. Of course, as His Holiness the Dalai Lama has said, the younger generation is the future of Tibet. So it is very important to do something for the Tibetan cause - it's time to do something. We must do something to benefit Tibet, and it's time to do it.

During my childhood, I didn't get any chance to study or obtain a modern education, even though we were encouraged to learn as much as possible. It simply wasn't available to us. Now, all younger Tibetans in exile have a chance to study foreign languages and obtain a modern education, so I recommend they study hard and take advantage of this precious opportunity - and do so for the benefit of all Tibetans.